Member since June 21, 2018
showerthoughts posted an update 7 months, 2 weeks ago
Most natural born citizens would fail their own countries citizenship test.
showerthoughts published “Image” 8 months ago
Life in fact never gave us lemons, we genetically crossbred other fruits to make them. We create our own problems.
showerthoughts published “Image” 9 months, 4 weeks ago
Guaranteed the character in a movie is very important when they step out of a car and only show their feet first
showerthoughts published “Image” 10 months, 1 week ago
When people think about “The Wizard of Oz”, the actual Wizard of Oz is one of the last characters people actually think about
Wheel of Fortune’s minimum wheel prize has kept up with inflation better than the federal minimum wage has.
The Bucs perfectly captured the spirit of Tampa by their feature player being a middle aged man who spent his career in the northeast and then moved to Florida to retire
If you can’t look back at your younger self and realize that you were an idiot, you are probably still an idiot.
Dads tell cheesy jokes not because humour gets worse with age, but because the more life experience you have, the more value you place on anything that might make someone laugh, even if it’s at your own expense.
Worms in apples has been less of a problem than what we expected as kids.
People who don’t understand how Clark Kent can pass as superman have never seen Tony Hawk without a skateboard
When filling up on gas, men are probably more likely to shake the gas nozzle before putting it back than women are.
Some people masturbate more than they brush their teeth.
The implication of a hotdog being puréed meat in animal casing (intestine) is that a hotdog doesn’t stop being a hotdog even after we eat it. By that conclusion, we, as the hotdog’s casing, become hotdogs ourselves when we eat hotdogs.
You aren’t paid according to how hard you work, you are paid according to how hard you are to replace
Being able to tolerate the sound of your own voice in a video is probably the highest form of self acceptance.
The international space station takes the smartest people on the planet and turns them into maintenance workers
showerthoughts published “Meme” 10 months, 1 week ago
Drinking cow’s milk is okay, but drinking a woman’s breast milk is weird. Sucking a woman’s breast is okay, but sucking a cow’s udder is weird.
showerthoughts published “Meme” 1 year, 2 months ago
The older that you get the easier it is to buy something that will last a lifetime.
Nobody knows who the loneliest person alive is
We do not check the refrigerator multiple times to find new food, we check to see if our standards have dropped enough to eat what was available.